From My "Way Back" Memory

Don't know what brought this to mind, maybe thinking about how kids sometimes do things when they're young that scare the b-jeezuz out of them at the time, but when they look back many years later, it's hilarious.  I can't help but think of all the shenanigans my own kids tell me about now (that they did as youngsters) and I was clueless about at the time.  I laugh now, but I doubt I would've laughed then!  LOL   I'm glad I didn't catch them and try to break their spirit!

And also, running for "The Painted Turtle" causes me imagine parents who have children with a catastrophic disability or terminal illness and no doubt WISH their child could be rambunctious!

So here's my story:

I was about 6 or 7, and my sister Linda 18 months older.  We were home alone (yikes).  Actually, we had a babysitter who lived across the street, so I'm sure we "had permission" to go home for a minute.  This is the same babysitter who tied my younger brother John to our clothesline post on top of an anthill...but that's another story! 

Anyhow, we lived in a little 2 bedroom house in Baldwin Park, four of us kids in one bedroom...yup...and Mom & Dad in theirs.  Well, Mom & Dad always locked their bedroom door when they were gone, and being the mischievous little girl that she was, MY SISTER (I was an angel of course) decided that we really needed to get in there and see WHY they needed to lock it.  The hot water heater closet (yes they used to be inside the house in the olden days) was right next to their bedroom and we knew that they kept the key to their door on top of the hot water heater.  So of course, I was directed by Linda to retrieve it.  She said, "You're taller than me, so just stand on the handle and you can reach it."  She used to always boss me around even though I was bigger than she was...that continued until she left to get married!  LOL

Well, the "handle" she was talking about was, yes, the spigot used to drain it.  I know you can see it coming now.  LOL  So I got a foot up onto the spigot and reached for the key.  As I did so my foot turned...oops!  Boiling hot water started pouring out.  It was summer and we both had on shorts and were barefoot.   Holy crap...we didn't know what to do.  We'd both jumped back out of the way after getting burned and were scared to stand in the water to turn the spigot off.  Water was running into our parents bedroom and down the hall toward the living room.  One of us finally braved it and got it turned off. But now what?  We could clean up the water in the living room and hall, but we were still locked out of my parents room.

Looking back now, it's hysterical, although I can still feel the panic like it was yesterday!  We cleaned up the wet floor as best we could.  Did we not think Mom would notice all the soaking wet towels?   But I don't think she ever did.  Maybe we were smart enough to hang them on the clothesline to dry.  Anyhow, we then high-tailed it back to the babysitter's and agonized about what was going to happen when Mom & Dad entered their bedroom.  We figured "death" or at least no TV for the rest of our lives.  

So, they got home and Linda and I went straight to our bedroom (and probably hid under the bed) and listened as they walked into their bedroom.  Nothing!  We waited a little longer...nothing...how could that be??!!  Neither of them were what you'd call "count to ten" kind of parents.  LOL  So Linda and I looked at each other and decided it was safe to go take a look.  We walked into their room and there wasn't a drop of water on the floor!  What?  OMG, I wish I could've seen the look on our faces...it must've been priceless.  All I can say now is "Thank God for hardwood floors."  

We never did find out why they locked their door...looking back, knowing them, it was probably sex toys they didn't want us to find.  Tee Hee!!  Or maybe my Dad's gun...yeah...that must've been it!  Sure, that's what they'll say .  LOL   I sure do miss my sis...we did have fun together growing up (most of the time).  We are, after all, sisters!!.

Well Let's Just Hope This Guy Doesn't Pass Me !!

From a press release I read today about a guy attempting to break a record at the L.A. Marathon: 

An attempt will be made, based on standards set by the Guinness World Records staff, for the “Heaviest Person to Complete a Marathon..” [Now why didn't I think to apply?? LOL]

The heaviest-finisher effort will be made by 40-year-old Kelly Gneiting of Ft. Defiance, Arizona, a three-time U.S. Sumo champion and former long-haul trucker, who actually completed the 2008 race in 11:52:11 on a whim. "A couple of buddies met me in Las Vegas and then we flew to Los Angeles," he said, noting that his friends filmed him during the race; he finished at 8:14p.m. “If you go to YouTube and enter my name and ‘marathon,’ there's a ten-minute film of me running. I completed the LA Marathon three years ago at 430 pounds, and will complete it again.” Currently weighing 410 pounds, the six-foot-tall Gneiting says he trains everyday, with a six-mile jog on Saturdays, in addition to walking a mile-and-a-half each way to his job as a statistician at the Ft. Defiance Indian Hospital.

The Guinness World Records requirements state that Gneiting must be weighted immediately before and immediately after the race and the entire race must be filmed. The current record is 275 pounds, and although Gneiting’s 2008 effort would have set the record, he didn’t apply for it. He said that the 2008 race “was the hardest day of my life,” but is more than ready for the 2011 challenge on the Stadium to the Sea course. And with a wrestler’s bravado, he growled that "I train at 7,000 feet on broken glass shards and cattle wire, so a few uppity hills into Santa Monica don't scare me.” 

[OMG is he serious ??? Those uppity hills scare me plenty!!]

He expects to complete the race between 9-11 hours, jogging about half of the course and walking the rest.

 [Oh Lord...and we wonder why L.A is full of potholes LOL !]

Hope he wears a more conservative outfit to run the marathon in!  Can you say "CHAFING?!"  Jeeze, there's not enough "Glide" in the country to keep him from blistering in places I don't even want to think about!

Well, I'm Alive...Just!

Phew....I did it.  Yesterday I decided that today would be the day that I tested the old chassis to see if she would hold up in the long haul just walking, no jogging allowed.  I also wanted to see if I "hit the wall" at all.   I started at 8:20AM and went 20 miles.  Yup, 20!  I finished at 2:08PM.  The most boring 5 hours and 48 minutes that I can ever recall.  At mile 10 I had to stop and check the bottom of my right heel, as it was hurting something awful.  Couldn't see anything, so just kept going as best I could.  I stopped at the house for a few minutes and put on a blister bandage.  It didn't seem to help.  My feet in general are "my wall."  I walked to Fullerton Road and back 3 times, then once around Rowland High School.  I never really felt any big difference that I would say would make me unable to finish (just the feet)!

But the most awesome thing happened as I was in mile 19.  I was passing by a man sitting in his truck eating lunch under a shady spot in the street by the high school (yes it was pretty warm out).  He looked at me and said, "Boy, you're a real walker, didn't I see you by Pathfinder Park near Fullerton Road?"  I told him yes, that I was walking 20 miles today in preparation for the L.A. Marathon.  He replied, "Wow, are you serious?  That's great, you're doing good!"  Boy that was wonderful to hear, and it really kind of gave me a spurt of energy, and I forgot about my feet for a minute.  I think that the same thing will happen during the Marathon with the crowds.  I'm excited!

Yup, I did it!  I figure now I know.  I know that it might take me a helluva long time to finish the marathon, but I can physically do it.  I am no longer worried that my physical self will let me down.  I always knew I had the mental fortitude to do it, but once in awhile, that just isn't enough.  With my bad feet, ankles and legs, I may not be able to jog, but who the heck really cares?  I'm running...ummm..I mean jogging/walking for a really awesome charity.  It's not just about me anymore.  It makes me feel really confident.

On the downside, when I got home and looked at my seriously painful feet, I found I did indeed have a blister on the bottom of my right heel about the side of a poker chip, and a blister on my left foot near the bottom that was huge.  I don't think I really even felt that one during the 20 miles!  I can't put any pressure at all on either of them...can't walk on my right heel.  For about a half hour after I got home I felt BAAAAD!  Then I heated the jacuzzi, and ahhhhhhhhhh!

Hope I can get them to heal quickly, probably won't be running any this week!  So now I'm researching how to prevent them in the future!

I have no doubt in my mind I could've finished another 6 miles today.  So I'm good to go...just slow LOL!  !

Holy Moly.  Ewwwwww!  Look at that swollen ankle too!

You Are What You Eat !

Well, again, "they" say "you are what you eat."  And again "they" appear to know what they're talking about!   So, last night I had an early dinner of Top Ramen, which I know is bad, but I was just too lazy to cook anything else and afraid that if I went to get fast food I'd pick something reaaalllly bad....waaait for it, waaait for it...3 hours later I ate a dozen Oreos and a Snicker Bar, then washed it down with a BIG gin and tonic.  Are you laughing yet (or perhaps gagging...LOL), because that wasn't the end...that would be the sleeping pill at 2AM!  OMG, are you kidding???  This woman is supposed to be in training!!!  For what, the "Biggest Loser!!!???

So, you ask, how does this all tie in to "you are what you eat?"  Well, let me tell you...I did still go for my run today, albeit LATE (10:30AM), and without eating anything at all this morning (due to the guilt from last night's indiscretions...LOL) and by mile 2, yes 2, as in two, my legs were TOAST!...with peanut butter!  Which I probably should've eaten before I ran this morning!  I couldn't believe it...they were starting to cramp and I had to keep stopping to stretch them out...what a joke...you'd have thought I'd run 10 miles.

That being said, I did keep plugging along for 6 miles.  And I did it by thinking about all that I have to be thankful for and how lucky I am to live in a place where I'm free to do pretty much what I want.  That's when I decided that all my family and friends and the groups that I care about are going to get me through this marathon.  I started the list in my head during my run, and when I got home, put it all on a spreadsheet.  I listed each mile, and who I'm going to dedicate that mile to.  So when I'm running, I'll be thinking "I have to keep going, I can't give up during [so and so's] mile."  I'm actually going to print out the list and tape it to my arm so I'll know who I dedicated each particular mile to...because as you know, I won't remember if it's not written down. LOL

Here's my list...hope I haven't forgotten anyone...you know me!

MILE	PERSON/GROUP	BECAUSE...
1	Myself	I'm doing it!
2	Mom & Dad	I love them & they gave me good genes
3	Mark M*ing	He was 1st person to make me believe in me
4	Isabel	I love her & want to inspire her
5	Tiffany	I love her & want to inspire her
6	Madison	I love her & want to inspire her
7	Tyler	I love him & want to inspire him
8	Valerie & Addison	I love them & want to inspire them
9	Brittany & Kirk	I love them & want to inspire them
10	Gaby	I love her & want to inspire her
11	Stacie & Kirk	I love them & want to inspire them
12	Olivia	I love her & want to inspire her
13	Jillian	I love her & want to inspire her
14	Chris & Cindy	I love them & want to inspire them
15	Jay & Kim	I love them & want to inspire them
16	Tim & Lauren	I love them & want to inspire them
17	Melanie	I love her & want to inspire her
18	Theresa & Ralphie	I love them & want to inspire them
19	Bethie & Mike	I love them & want to inspire them
20	Lauren	I'm proud of her & she's hurting by now
21	Patty	I love her & she's my BFF & inspires me!
22	Cops Killed in the Line of Duty	They gave their all for their community
23	Wounded Warriors	They never gave up
24	Painted Turtle Campers	They may never be able to run
25	All My Friends & Family	They are supportive and awesome
26	Lauren & myself	We made it
26.2	The Naysayers	They said I couldn't or shouldn't...Hahahaha on them!

Thank you to all MY inspirations!!  Now...just wait to see what I have in store for tomorrow...wink, wink!

They Say the Memory is the First Thing to Go!

Well, whomever "they" are,  I can't refute them.  I had to testify as an expert witness in two different court cases today.  Ugh...a public speaker I'm not.  I did OK, but twice during my first testimony I totally blanked out on the word I was looking for; "association" was the first and "signal" the second.  I felt like such a buffoon!  I just sat there stammering, how professional!  Oh well, such is life. Then, when I turned my phone back on after leaving court at the end of the day, I saw I had a text message from another DDA (Deputy District Attorney) on a case that I'm scheduled to testify on the day after tomorrow.  I thought "Oh SNAP, now what?"  Well...good news for ALL of us.  The defendant in the case (involving distribution of child pornography), just pled out to a LIFE sentence (which really means 25 years to life)!  Now that's what I'M talkin' about!  I wish all the scumbags of the earth would do the same.  Now if "life" really meant "til death," I'd be a super happy camper!  On top of that, I don't have to testify now....YAY!  All in all a decent ending to my work day.

Then I came home! LOL  Actually, when I got home I quickly donned my running gear and took off on a quick (well not real quick) 2 mile jog, before I had a chance to talk myself out of it...tsk tsk!.  I did "best" my time for this particular route by one minute per mile though....happy!  Now I will do a 30-40 minute "Wii - Active Fit" workout.  I will be feeling pretty self-righteous while watching "The Biggest Loser" tonight.  I think last week I was eating a bag of chips and drinking a diet soda while watching...ouch...sorry Jillian...sorry Bob! Hahahahaha!

Well, that's it for now...gotta workout before I change my mind...what mind??  Forgot where I put it....LOL!

Lordy Lordy!

What was I thinking???  So I just finished the equivalent of a half-marathon (13.1 miles) and it took me 3 hours and 27 minutes!  Holy cow, at that pace I won't be anywhere near my goal of under 6 hours...it's now calculated at just under 7 hours!!!  Sorry Lauren, you're gonna be finishing waaay before me, so bring your iPod for company!  I'm hoping that the excitement along the marathon route will help me plug along a little faster due to the distraction factor.  Running today was sooooooooo boring and the old feet started yelling at me at about mile 8.  By the time I hit 10 they were screaming bloody murder! Hahahaha!  Heaven only knows what they're gonna be telling me at mile 26.2.  They will probably tell me I'm on my own and I may be crawling over that finish line. LOL

On a positive note, I haven't had any equipment issues...yay!  No blisters or rashes from stuff that rubs the wrong way.  I think I might get some "running" shoes today though,  I only have "walking" shoes.  Maybe my feet  know that and that's what they're hollering about...yeah right!  What's their excuse any other time?!  They're just "moody"  Hahahaha

I've heard about this so-called "runner's high" after pushing yourself for 30-40 minutes...well this body had PLENTY 'O TIME to kick it in.  All I felt was runner's pain!  However, if runner's high can also be described as the 3-5 seconds you see stars before hitting the deck, well I could actually see that happening. Snicker Snicker!  Wanna real laugh?  I was perusing the results of last year's marathon....and there was an 87 year old woman that would've beat me by a minute!  Jeeze!!  I guess I should've started training way before now....like maybe 10 years ago. LOL

Oh well, it's all good really.  I'm just complaining to complain.   I'm thankful that I'm healthy enough to even give it a shot...it was always on my "bucket list" for some reason.  Next...skydiving!

So here's an image of my Half-Marathon route: Ran from house to Fullerton Road twice and then the little loop to Colima and back to the house!

Call Me Crazy !

For those of you who don't already know, I'm training to participate (notice I didn't say running...don't want to offend "real" runners...LOL) in the Los Angeles Marathon being run on March 20th. The route is awesome; winding its way from Dodger Stadium to the Santa Monica Pier. My daughter-in-law Lauren and I are doing it together. She will absolutely run circles around me, which is waaay ok, and knowing that actually drives me to train harder. Thanks Lauren, I'm so proud of you! But jeeze Louise, it's seriously hard work, and makes me wonder, "What the heck was I thinking ?" when I suggested it in the first place!  I'm just praying my feet and ankles hold up 'til it's over. I plan on getting in shape for this thing and staying in shape. Yay me!

Holy cow, as I'm writing this I'm watching "The Bachelor" (don't laugh...well yeah, go ahead and laugh) and it's only the second week and there is soooooo much DRAMA already, crying girls, bitchy girls, OMG it's hilarious. The way some of them are acting makes them look really ugly! Hahahahaha!

OK back to my marathon. I can't believe I really used to be able to "run!" I ran "Baker to Vegas" (B2V) for heaven's sake, what the "bleep" happened?! Oh yeah, several surgeries and a couple of decades (and pounds...ouch). I crack myself up!  But you know, I think a huge part of doing something like a marathon is mental. There's something that I always say to people that ask me if my feet are ok.  Even though they hurt most of the time, I tell them, "I'm just glad I HAVE feet!"  There are sooo many people that are far worse off than I'll ever be. No pain, no gain.

Well, I wrote in yesterday's blog that this is intended to be an autobiographical blog, and I just remembered my B2V story that makes me say to you "don't ever trust a policeman when they say 'trust me!'"

So....I was but a lowly boot, aka, officer still on probation, assigned to Shootin' Newton, when the B2V team captain approached me and asked me if I would be an "alternate" runner on the team.  I was very hesitant because #1, I was a boot, and #2, my best mile was just under 8 minutes (not great for a relay race), and #3, I would be the only female on the team. He said "trust me, you won't have to run, but the rules say we have to have an alternate and there isn't anyone else available." I told him no, but because of excuse #1, I wasn't really allowed to say no. Chuckle chuckle. That being said, the guy PROMISED me that Newton had never ever had to use an alternate runner and they'd never had a female actually run in the race, and certainly didn't want that to change (what a bunch of chauvinist pigs...yes, pun intended...tee hee).

Fast-forward about a month to Baker, California, March of 1987. At about 6 in the morning I hop into the chase van with a few other guys and we just drop off and pick up runners as they start and finish their particular leg. There are 20 legs, each one a little different (hills, distance, etc.) Mind you, I wasn't even going to spend the night in Vegas after the race. The plan was to ride in the van from B2V, and then head home. I was dressed in running shorts and a t-shirt. I had nothing to eat or drink because we couldn't make "pit stops." I was dozing at about 2 in the morning when one of the guys shakes me and says, "You gotta run!" Oh funny haha. He said "No, I'm not kidding, it's snowing over the pass and the runner for this leg (#13...how telling) can't get over the pass from Vegas, where he's been waiting." Really ??!! I didn't even have a jacket! The snowstorm had come out of nowhere and caught everyone off guard. So, I borrowed an unlined windbreaker from the driver, who wore about a size 100, and stepped out into a cold-hell!

OMG, I've never been so cold in my life. I'm sure I looked ridiculous with my bare legs sticking out from under this tent-sized jacket. LOL!! I can't remember how many times I caught myself from falling because the ground was so icy. It was unbelievable that I was actually running in a snowstorm! I did finish, but don't even know if I ever knew what my time was. I was just numb and glad to be finished.

That 1987 B2V Race is indisputably the most infamous of all the B2V races ever. Nooooo, not because I ran in it, but because the 1987 B2V Relay was halted at Leg 14 due to "blizzard" conditions on Nevada Highway 160 over Mountain Springs Pass. Seriously??!!  They couldn't have halted it one leg earlier!??  My luck :0

So there you have it, my first relay race was "infamous"...and Newton had its first female B2V runner.....hahahahaha on them !!!

So with that, I encourage you all to challenge yourselves with staying young at heart and to treat your body like it's the only one you'll ever have (boy that was brilliant wasn't it ! LOL). Be good to yourself.  Believe me, it's so much easier to STAY in shape than to GET in shape!